Monday, January 24, 2011

Damn Good Sentence Contest, Part 1

If you are reading this entry, consider yourself a judge. 

A judge in the "Damn Good Sentence" contest. It starts today, ends on Saturday, and will come in 3 waves. All sentences were pulled from my students' personal narratives. 



Today is the Most Cleverly Descriptive Contest. Wednesday will be the Most Suspenseful Contest. Friday will be the Most Quietly Brilliant Contest.

You have 3 votes. One in each category. Use them wisely, and leave them in the comment section. Voting will be closed on Saturday evening. 



MOST CLEVERLY DESCRIPTIVE: Choose one.

1) My elbow. It looked like an antelope freshly punctured by a lioness.
2) “Go, go, go!” my coach said, wagging his hand like a dog’s tail.
3) I watched as the drops of blood were pulled and stretched into bands in the dirty tub water.
4) She had snipped and snipped so much until she made two gigantic triangles that looked like the pyramids of Giza. Apparently she had been studying geometry, because she not only made those triangles but also a square on one sideburn and a circle on the other.
5) We were heading to the door like a train about to run off the tracks, except there was no Superman there to help us.
6) There were low branches that hung thin curtains of leaves over the rushing water and the silent rocks that held many secrets. Squirrels tangoed through the trees in rhythm.
7) It was a dust bunny with golden glitter eyes - from St. Patrick’s Day when we were covered with it by leprechauns during nap time - and one shiny staple for a mouth.
8) My brother’s long, brown hair flopped around like a bloodhound’s ears when it finds a rabbit.


Vote or die,
Ms. P

6 bonus points:

Brandie said...

These are all pretty good! You know I love any mention of squirrels (sorry, AK), but I gotta go with #7. It's the most vivid to me.

erin said...

So hard to choose!! Your students wrote fantastic sentences! My vote goes to 5. I love the image of the train, and the superman comment is very clever.

Anonymous said...

Number 7

Carrie Mastley said...

6 because it's actually really nice.

Anonymous said...

I'm going with #3.

toppla said...

Numero 6. Beautiful.

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