How students are like hostages and bar patrons

Sometimes chuckling at a little irreverent teaching advice is the only thing that can get me through a day of A+ adversity.

"Just yell at your students... Not that they are in trouble, but they are hostages... Beat them with knowledge."

-said by my brilliant friend Bess, who is student teaching, plays in a washboard band, and has a daddy that resembles Mr. Miyagi...a lot

"After lunch the clock moves much slowly than our students do. Your class begins to remind you of a bar full of little drunk people: They want constant attention and often don’t realize how loud they are talking. They have short attention spans; rarely think of the consequences of their actions; and, as you will find out tomorrow, they don’t always remember what happened the day before.” 

-From the brilliant book, "See Me After Class: Advice for Teachers by Teachers" by Roxanna Elden

Cheekily yours,

Ms. P

Get This Kid a Book Deal, 2: Ghost Town-

I never let my kids write fiction in class.  Perhaps it's a personal hang up. I know all my adolescent experiments in fiction were filled with stereotypes and cop-outs like "And then I woke up. It was all a dream." 

But they beg and beg. So this week, I finally gave in...a bit. We've attempted spurts of fiction. For example, when working on describing setting, I gave them the following prompt:

"A group of teens are exploring dark woods when they stumble upon an abandoned village."

Here are some of their sentences:

"The trees in the woods looked like skinny arms grabbing for lost visitors."

"The grass acted as spikes on the ground, protecting the land from intruders."

"The woods were so dark, it was as if God forgot to turn on the lights."

(Another variation of this one was, "It was so dark that it was as if someone had forgotten to pay the light bill.")

"The dark clouds swirled above them like moths as they stared at the abandoned village."

"The radiant moonlight skimmed over their heads like flashlights in the trees."

"The animals were as terrified as two-year-olds at the dentist."

"You could almost hear the forgotten hum of the villagers."

They make the hard work of original writing look so effortless. 

Basically, I issued up the fiction challenge, and they responded with a, "Ain't no thang, lady."

Yet again, they prove me wrong. Each day, they show me how very little adults, like myself, truly understand about their capabilities.

Slack-jawed,

Ms. P

Thirty Dollar Throwdown: Leopard Cardigan

Today's Thirty Dollar Throwdown still incorporates the inspirational wedges, but this is a casual Friday outfit.

Even though I'm not much of a holiday sweater lover, like your traditional teacher, I do adore a good cardigan. It's classic English teacher without looking dowdy.

Throw some red, patent-leather heels on this matronly 'marm!

A conservative estimate of how many I own would be in the 20s. Rain, sleet, snow, sun...I find a way to work a sweater into my outfit.

Today's look features one of my favorite knit finds in a long time - this TEN DOLLAR leopard number from Wal-Mart. That's right, Wal-Mart. It's got to be a scientifically-proven fact that wearing leopard makes you happier. Just ask this girl:

"This leopard leotard is makin' me feel fierce."

And middle school teachers need all the fierce they can get on Friday.

Some less adventurous dressers may fear that a leopard cardi wouldn't get a lot of wear. Au contraire! The trick is this: Treat leopard like a neutral.

You can mix it with any color:

Blue

Black

Other neutrals

Yellow

Subtle prints

Red, etc.

My second favorite thing about today's outfit is the Nancy Drew t-shirt from Out of Print, a brand that sells t-shirts emblazoned with classic book covers. How teacherrific! 

P.S. Out of Print tees are for sell in my store's Teacher Apparel category.

Behold: the Outfit

30 Dollar Throwdown, 2 

Walmart.com: George - Women's Print Long-Sleeve V-Neck Cardigan: Women, $10
BDG Slim Straight Leg Jean - Grey, $20
Women's Mossimo® Pilar Strappy Wedge Sandals - Brown : Target, $30
Cathy Shoulder Bag, $17
Fabric Embedded Ring, $3.80
Forever21.com - New Arrivals - 1000014445, $4.50
Nancy Drew book cover t-shirt $28
Vintage Glasses Frames with Silver Deco Silver *PRICE REDUCTION! * -...





Feening for Friday Fashion,
Ms. P


P.S. What was your favorite Nancy Drew or Hardy Boys mystery? I devoured The Hidden Staircase.

Conflicting Feelings of Nyeeehh

Lately, my students have been writing persuasive essays on these topics. While they've been doing an incredible job writing persuasive anecdotes to sprinkle throughout their arguments, they have had trouble stating their opinions with conviction. 


For instance, I've gotten a lot of sentences that start like this:


"It's possible that..."
"One might think..."
"It could happen..."
"I can't promise..."

I want to scream the famous (within my family at least) line from the Brady Bunch, "SAY WHAT YOU MEAN, GREG BRADY!"

Why are they afraid to write with conviction? If they're not convinced, their readers will never be. Luckily, people exist who are more eloquent than me. One of them is Taylor Mali.  

Poet and Teacher Taylor Mali

If you are a teacher, a poet, a thinker, a breather, he and his words are going to be your new best friends. He wrote an incredible poem entitled, "Totally, Like, Whatever" that beautifully illustrates the point that I want to make to my students about using convicting language. 

Watch it here:





Typography from Ronnie Bruce on Vimeo.


Perhaps, watching and discussing this video tomorrow will help us eliminate those invisible question marks, ya know? Hopefully, his words will encourage them (and me!) to be, like, personally invested in our own opinions.


And if that doesn't work, then I'm going to have to hang this poster on my classroom door. I am SO not above it.

I would be remiss if, as a teacher blogger,  I did not direct you to Taylor's most notorious poem "What Teachers Make." You can watch it below. His words and delivery will have you laughing appreciatively and nodding in agreement. 

"Be honest. What do you make?"

And I wish he hadn't done that 

(asked me to be honest) 

because, you see, I have a policy 

about honesty and ass-kicking: 

if you ask for it, I have to let you have it.

If you are a teacher and happen upon a down day, watch this and get rejuvenated. Take account of all the important things you do that cannot be measured or quantified.

Power to the poets,

Ms. P

What do teachers do....

When you google "what do teachers do," the search engine auto completes the question for you:

You'll notice that two of the top ten completions wonder about what teachers do in the summer. Thus, I surmised that you're sitting at home just DYING to know my summer plans. Before I reveal them, let me take you a little further down the Google rabbit hole where internet users answer the aforementioned query.

"buy more sweaters with prints on them and denim skirts and bad perfume."

"They drink a lot."

Note the teacher under her said, "Read yahoo answers saying what horrible people we are and how overpaid and underworked."

HILARIOUS, internet-ers.  On to my summer plans. I could do something definitively useful like enrolling in grad school classes or tutoring children. But, I'm going to fulfill a lifelong dream instead. I'm going to turn my converted garage into my own personal home library.

It's so Sherlock Holmes. So Virginia Woolf. So Jo March. So Ms. P. And I'm thrilled.

Right now my garage serves as a holding pen for the dogs when I'm at work. They have a doggie door that lets them out and dirt, gravel, and sticks in. 

It looks a lot like this, but with more dirt, which is why you aren't seeing the real thing:

But, I have a vision! It is going to be divine. 

MY MASTER PLAN:

1) All white surfaces....

....except for one chalkboard wall for recording memorable lines from favorite books:

2) Classic Persian rug

3) A black and white striped couch with good bones

4) A tweed chair - the professor's blazer of furniture

5) A side-table that looks like I chopped it down myself

6) Literary-themed throw pillows...in case I run out of reading material

7) A wall of letters - being careful not to situate the wrong ones together...yikes!

8) Floating shelves that look like an art-collector with full hands just happened by them - so casual.

9) On those shelves will be (and this is my favorite part) black and white photos of people reading framed in black frames with white mats.

10) And, of course, books. Tall books. Small books. Musty books. Fresh books. Dearly beloved books.

END OF MASTER PLAN. TAH DAHHH.

Basically what I'm saying is, I'll buy a Kindle just as soon as I can figure out how to design a room around it. Nothing inspires me like scores of lovely, bound stories. But don't worry, I'm not a total elitist. I'll let you lounge in my garage/library with your eReader. I'll even serve you eCoffee.

Watching Craigslist like a hawk,

Ms. P

QUESTION:

1) What is your dream room? A home gym? A chef's kitchen? A meth lab?

All Hot and Bothered

We're gettin' all political up in Ms. P's class this week. We're starting persuasive essays. The only problem is EVERYONE keeps catching the flu. 

But that is a(whole)nother tale. I've spent my last few days brainstorming what hot topics will get them talking. What do they care about enough to generate an essay that's chock full of their personality? What will make them spirited enough to cause spontaneous researching?

Here are the 12 topics they can choose from with mentor essays for them to peruse:

1) Are standardized tests valuable?

2) Should adults be able to ban books from school libraries?

3) Should those charged with animal cruelty face harsher penalties than they do presently? (a current local debate)

4) Should the United States continue to fully fund NASA?

5) Is spanking an appropriate punishment for children?

6) Should fast food restaurants have to post nutritional information for their meals on the menu?

7) Is graffiti art? Should graffiti artists be harshly penalized?

8) Some cities have proposed bans on sagging pants. Is this fair?

9) Does having a Facebook account negatively or positively affect your academic life?

10) How should Major League Baseball deal with steroid use, particularly with respect to the Hall of Fame?

11) Do adults praise and encourage your generation too much? Does this affect your ability to accept criticism?

12) Does texting affect your academic life? How?

Just in case, I posted this on the board....

"The views stated in these essays do not necessarily reflect the the views of Ms. P or our school district."

A girl has to cover all her bases.

Now it's your turn to answer the questions:

1) Which one of these 12 issues is most interesting to you?

2) Which one of these do you care the least about?